10 Tips from 'This is Day One' by Drew Dudley

Welcome Queens & Kings, to another blog post. Today I'll be sharing with you 10 lessons I have learnt from reading this book: 'This is Day One' - A practical guide to leadership that matters. written by Drew Dudley. My dad got this book at a leadership seminar of some sort and this copy was actually signed by the other- who I knew nothing about but apparently he has spoken on ted talk and is like a leadership guru.

Since I was quarantined and couldn't go out to pick more fun books to read I decided to pick this one up to read and I can tell you that it was a great decision. This book tells the stories of not just the author but of 'regular human beings who taught him lessons on leadership. This book redefines leadership and helps you to put leadership values into practice.

What the book is about:

This book highlights the fact that everyone is a leader but most leadership go uncelebrated and unrecognized because they don't fit the image of leadership we as a society have created- ' mostly males with large companies & businesses' however at the core leadership is about the impact made on the lives of those around us. Powerful impacts are made by 'regular' human being daily but we often don't acknowledge the leadership in their actions.

Leadership in the book is defined as " your willingness to act in a way that makes it more likely for you to make a positive impact in your life and those around you." it is about making a series of consistent positive small decisions each day.

What does 'Day One' refer to?

Have you ever felt excited about the first day of a new experience? Your first day at work, the first day at school, first day as a business owner, first day at a new place for a trip.... Can you remember the feels? How focused and intent on making the best of whatever it was, the feeling of confidence, peace & satisfaction. Day One is living so that each day of your life has this preface. You forget the ills of yesterday and acquire new hope and restoration each day. Day One leadership is about living each day with new excitement and focus to make consistent actions. You enact non-negotiable behaviours that will lead you to the person you want to be.

This notion is important because most times we allow the results of yesterday to impact the actions of today. Thinking of leadership as a daily action or non-negotiable like brushing your teeth is sure to develop you into the kind of leader you want to be. I've never thought of it like that.

"Day One leadership philosophy represents a daily commitment to making decisions & engaging in behaviours that are consistent with your core leadership values" Values are ideologies that guide the way you live and act, in this case as a leader. When asked what are your values some can't answer because they haven't taught of it while there are others like me that can recite a bunch of words, words that I would like to live by but I don't live by it every day and if I don't, are they really guidelines for my life? Leadership is about daily practising the values you want.

What I have learnt:

1. The great way to practice the values you want is to create an actionable question that can be answered daily.

1. Identify a Value. (Eg. Impact)

2. Clearly define value(Eg. impact is a commitment to creating moments that cause people to feel they are better off for having interacted with you)

3. Operationalize the value by turning it into an action-oriented question that you can answer every day. Don't let it be a question that can be answered by a simple yes or no. Intuitively create time& moments for answering the question. (Eg. What have I done shown someone that they matter today?)

2. Recognize and Highlight Leadership in Those Around You and Even Strangers. Elevate Others.

At times someone does something that our mind thinks ' oh wow that's so nice' 'that person just made my day' 'this individual is really inspiring'. What we don't do, is say it out loud. We don't acknowledge the individual's leadership or even appreciate it with words or gifts. We often don't do this because these persons don't fit the image of the suit-wearing, crowd gathering individuals we accord the title of 'Leader' to. However, we fail to see that the Instagram personality who always makes you laugh, the cashier that is overly pleasant, the stranger that offers you help, these and all the people who have had some positive impact in your life have attributes of leadership in them. Elevate them by shouting them out, speak up and appreciate them.

3. Stop Wearing Your 'Fake Leg'

Your fake leg refers to anything that obstructs your progress, even hurts you, but you keep doing it in order to please those around you. Wearing your fake leg is saying to others your normal deserves more respect than my normal'

but the thing is if you don't respect your normal who will? (Stephanie Dixon)

4. Practice Rejection

This might be the least fun one, at first but it entails trying something you think might not work or asking something from someone when you think you are going to get rejected. Why in the world would you do that? One, it you will familiarise your self with the rejection so much so that when you get rejected for things you truly need it won't dishearten or demoralize you.

I remember when there were prospects of me getting a particular job, due to a credential I ended up getting rejected, I was utterly demoralizing, I cried and just felt down. It wasn't any fault of mine yet I did not handle it the best, if I had better practice with rejection, I would have simply brushed it aside. Some of us are so afraid of any form of rejection, so we stay as long as possible in comfortable positions, however, to curate your best life you have to step into new territories, uncomfortable ones where you might experience rejection. Practising it makes you prepared. Secondly, this action teaches one courage. Courage can be described as an action taken when there is a possibility of loss.

5. Your Head and Heart are Your Most Valuable Assets

Mustafa, probably my favourite personality in the book explained this point so well: "Your head and heart are the most valuable pieces of property that you will ever control. If you are going to allow people access to your head and heart. You have got to get something valuable in return"

6. Get Rid of 'the list'

Drew explained that we often walk around in life with a subconscious list that has been derived from society, family and not from your belief or capabilities. Someone else made this list:

- go to school

- get a job

- get married

- get promoted

- get a house

- get promoted

- get kids

- get more promotions

- retire

- make sure your children do the same

I must say, my generation has done a lot in dismantling such a list. The truth is this might be your list but whether it is or not whatever 'list' you follow in life make sure it authentically reflects your perception of success, don't live up to another's expectation of success you will be sure to feel unfulfilled.

"Your life isn't suppose to unfold in a specific template" It is life: full of trials and error, road bumps, exciting adventures, recurring moments of pain and joy.

7. Don't Be Afraid Of Your Greatness

Joshua 1:9 "Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest"

Dudley retells the words of a driver which I would like to share: " Do not be afraid of your greatness. But know that individually we are limited but collectively we are limitless When we share with each other we increase our capacity to give... So many think they aren't great because something is 'missing'...if you have a life right now, in this world everything is available. Nothing is missing. You have everything you need for greatness, so you must live and live now. We are all destined for greatness. Your greatness is waiting to be claimed. But like anything that you want to claim, you have to turn something in to get it. Turn in your service, get your greatness...If you want to Turn in your service.. help someone reach a goal. And if ever you don't know how, just take a moment to see someone, listen to someone or connect with someone."

I want to add that the Joshua he referenced from the Bible received that vouch of his greatness from God with the condition that God's law does not depart from his mouth, he meditates on it continually, he acts in accordance to all the law then he will be sure of a prosperous life and good success (Joshua1:8) These promises and more are sure to you if you do the same.

8. Cultivate your Happiness

Waiting for outward sources to instigate happiness in you will pull you down and will make you lack it more often than not. Hence actively create systems in your life to provide you with happiness. As I type this blog I noticed my daily quote provided by 'Momentum' a personal dashboard on chrome, it says:

"Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present.”Jim Rohn

Ask yourself often: 'What have I done today to be good to myself ?'

Prepare for the days when you feeling down, hurt, tired or when you are in pain; by planting the seeds, do something good for you now that will benefit your exhausted version in the future.

Design your space to make you happy, create a desktop wallpaper that makes you happy; I designed a desktop wallpaper in canva and it is full of pictures of things that make me happy and a funny quote. Anytime I see it I smile. You could create a 'happy' digital album you could make use of google photos to do this; put a bunch of images that create immense joy in you. When you feel down then take a look at it.

"What's something you could do today that would cultivate a moment of happiness for you each day in the future? If you drive to work without the photograph of someone you love hanging from the mirror you're missing an opportunity to make yourself smile each day. If you don't drive, place a photo on the back of the front door of your house(or phone). Pick 5 friends, assign them days of the week and ask them to send you something they think will make you laugh on the assigned day. Return the favour for them. Your happiness is in your job description-plan for it today and cultivates it for the future."

9. Prepare for Failure

Failure when not prepared for can be devastating. When planning for a course of action or a project, integrate failure into every plan. It's not that you are preempting it, however, you plan for it is a courageous act and a defence mechanism against being dejected by failure. Plan for failure so it doesn't kill your momentum. Don't be afraid of failure, "failures are reps for your resilience muscle"

10. Ditch 5 Year Plan and Focus on 5 Year Momentum

Now, this was a bit interesting. We always year about making a 5-year plan in order to reach our goals or at least have a direction for the future. Dudley points out that having such a rudimentary plan can sometimes make you miss out on great opportunities because they do not fit in your plan. However, if you assess each opportunity by how much momentum it creates, every opportunity, including the unexpected is sure to get fair consideration. Momentum here would refer to the driving force gained, the propeller to continue on your journey towards your best life.

The book is full of gems and an active guide to curate your personal questions that will enhance your leadership attributes. I hope you implement any one of these points in your life.

Thanks for stopping by.

Never stop Curating your best life.

-Y.E.N